- "The Carnival's back in town y'know. It totally sucks, but I'm still gonna go!"
- — Mr. Buckingham
Billy Crane's Traveling Carnival is located southeast of Old Bullworth Vale. It is accessed through a tunnel leading out of Old Bullworth Vale. It is a fairly large carnival consisting of various minigames, rides, and other attractions. Despite the name, the carnival doesn't appear to travel, and it is open for the entire game. Admission costs $1.
The rides are all manned by Freeley. The Big Squid is a spinning ride of sorts. There is also a Big Canyon Railway and a Ferris Wheel. When riding them, the screen changes to a first person POV to simulate the feeling of being on them. If Jimmy rides too often, he may speak about vomiting and sometimes students appear vomiting after the ride.
The midway games can be played in exchange for tickets. How many tickets Jimmy wins depends on how well he performs. The tickets can then be exchanged for prizes in the Prize Tent. Completing Photography 5 will double the amount of tickets you earn by completing a game.
This game is run by Dorsey. Jimmy must throw baseballs at moving targets. The targets appear in three rows, and appear to be baseball players. He must hit the catchers; missing or hitting another target wastes a ball. He can also hit a one-time-target, a catcher's glove, for a big bonus. He has six balls total. For fun, try throwing the balls several times at Dorsey and see what happens.
This game is run by Crystal. It is a test of strength game where the character playing swings a hammer at a target. The player must mash a button to build power for the swing. The game is extremely easy; consequently the reward for winning is low. If the button is not pressed often enough, Jimmy falls over.
This is a dunk tank game. Hector is seated in the dunk tank, and the player must hit the bullseye on a target to drop him into the water. The gameplay is functionally identical to Penalty Shots. The player gets three shots, but only has to connect with one to win.
Run by Crystal, this game is a shooting range for a rubber band pistol. Moving targets fly by a fairly long backdrop. Jimmy has infinite shots but a finite time limit to get as high of a score as he can. Bottles are worth 5 points, Outlaws worth either 10 or 15 depending on how fast they're moving. Cowgirls deduct 10 points. Once per game a Sheriff's Star goes across the backdrop, it is worth 50 points. It is the most lucrative game at the carnival for winning tickets. A maximum of 20 tickets are awarded to the player for a score of 400 or above, far more than any other game at the carnival. Shooting 300 green bottles unlocks the Green Ninja costume.
A console for each arcade game can be found in the Prizes Tent.
- Main Article: Go-Kart Races
The carnival also has other attractions.
- Fortune Teller: Pay money and receive a fortune.
- Prize Tent: Jimmy can exchange tickets won on the midway for prizes. There is also one of each arcade console here, including the only Nut Shots console in the game.
- Broken Merry-go-round: This sits in the middle of the carnival, but is cordoned off with portable chain link fence and warning signs and throughout the year it is never repaired.
- Funhouse: Only accessible during the Funhouse Fun mission.
- Freak Show: A typical freak show. Includes a wrestling match between two midgets that Jimmy can bet on, up to $100. This is an easy way to make money, you save at the lighthouse after you earn it from the preps, go to the freak show and bet $100 on one of the wrestlers. If you win, save and repeat. If you lose, reload the save file and try again until you reach the money desired.